TEN STEPS TO PEACE
(1) Spend some time each day quietly reflecting on how we would
like to relate to ourselves and others.
(2) Remember that all human beings have the same needs.
(3) Check our intention to see if we are as interested in others
getting their needs met as our own.
(4) When asking someone to do something, check first to see if we
are making a request or a demand.
(5) Instead of saying what we DON’T want someone to do, say
what we DO want the person to do.
(6) Instead of saying what we want someone to BE, say what
action we’d like the person to take that we hope will help the
person be that way.
(7) Before agreeing or disagreeing with anyone’s opinions, try to
tune in to what the person is feeling and needing.
(8) Instead of saying “No,” say what need of ours prevents us
from saying “Yes.”
(9) If we are feeling upset, think about what need of ours is not
being met, and what we could do to meet it, instead of
thinking about what’s wrong with others or ourselves.
(10) Instead of praising someone who did something we like,
express our gratitude by telling the person what need of ours
that action met.
2001, revised 2004 Gary Baran & CNVC.
The right to freely duplicate this document is hereby granted.