Do You Play the Blame Game of Who’s Right and Who’s Wrong?
Depression, Anger, Guilt, Shame (DAGS) are caused by moralistic judgements or what we call Life-alienated thinking in Compassionate Nonviolent Communication (NVC).
We direct our Anger outward by blaming others, and direct it inward by blaming ourselves, which results in the arrival of its first cousins – Guilt, Shame and Depression.
Anger tells us we think the ‘bad person’ is somebody else.
Guilt, Shame and Depression tell us we think we are the ‘bad person’.
These are the feelings that result from Life-alienated thinking, moralistic judgements and the ‘domination’ and ‘power over’ systems we live in every day of our lives, in our homes, schools and workplaces. They lead to a culture of violence and bullying, adversely affecting others, or self-harm towards ourselves.
In NVC we call Depression, Anger, Guilt, Shame important alarms which let us know we are disconnected to our needs, values and what matters deeply to us.
What Will You Experience at this Mini-Workshop?
1) Life-serving vs Life-alienating communication
2) Unpacking the language of Depression, Anger, Guilt, Shame (DAGS)
3) Acknowledge without resistance the painful feelings of unmet needs and the ‘Jackal Show’
4) Recognize that DAGS do not arise because of another’s words or behaviour
5) Find the ‘gift’ beneath the Anger and transform it into Life-serving energy to ‘make life more wonderful’
6) Shift your thinking patterns and self-talk that lead to Guilt, Shame and Depression
7) Learn to Mourn the ‘sweet pain’ of unmet needs, painful relationships and to make requests of yourself and others
8) Experiential DAGS Dance on the ‘Flower of Life’
9) Role Playing yourself and those with whom you have an ‘Enemy Image’
10) Build your EQ Literacy with Empathy, Self-Compassion, Gratitude and Appreciation
Explore possible entrenched causative effects and triggers, self-judgements and fear. Learn to mourn and celebrate. Process clarity through the expression of feelings and needs, authenticity and vulnerability. Build gradual understanding and personal transformation, through self-empathy, self-connection, self-acceptance and radical self-compassion.
NVC supports connection with oneself and others so everyone’s needs are equally valued. This allows people to create strategies and meaningful solutions that resolve issues and create thriving relationships in all aspects of life. Using NVC Empathy tools, participants will learn how to transform everyday blame, shame, and critical expression into interactions that focus on mutual human needs. People who practice NVC have found greater authenticity in their communication, increased understanding, deeper connection and satisfying conflict resolution.
If you have attended a NVC Foundation training or The Power of Empathy workshops, and read, studied, watched videos and practised NVC, then this would be helpful to enrich your experience. If you are a “natural giraffe” and/or think you can gain meaningful insights into the NVC Empathy process at work, you’re very welcome to join us. There is learning to be gained at every level, as an observer or participant, and no one is ever turned away.
Date: Sunday 20 November 2016
Venue: see below
Book & Pay:
Towards venue costs, refreshments and photocopy handouts.
Please deposit into the following account with ‘NVC’ and your name as reference:
Trading Bank: Kiwibank
Name of Account: Spirit of Peace
Account Number: 38-9006-0358290-00
Enquiries/bookings email Sophia email@example.com
Phone/Text 027 345 2010
Sophia initiated and founded the NVC grassroots movement in the Wellington Region 12 years ago, and organised many workshops attended by keen participants throughout NZ. She trained with the founder of NVC, Dr Marshall Rosenberg, Robert Gonzales, Miki Kashtan, Sura Hart, Jean Morrison, Gina Lawrie and many other overseas trainers. She has facilitated a wide range of NVC workshops for community activists, spiritual and social change groups, including Death Cafes, Grief & Loss with Compassion & Empathy, Intentional Living, Steiner and Buddhist communities, Peace Movement Aotearoa, The Occupy NZ & Wellington movements, Inter/national Peace and Disarmament groups, Early Childhood Management, Alternative Adult Education, teachers, parents and children in school communities and the general public. She resonates deeply with the Spirituality of NVC and an abiding empathy for First Nations, the plight and healing of the world’s indigenous people, through NVC and cultural-spiritual awareness.
All Late Bookings Welcome – no one is turned away 🙂
Trinity Union Church
11 Hall Avenue (off Hall Street)
Newtown, Wellington, New Zealand
Instructions for the Trinity Union Church venue:
Pedestrian and car access through Hall Avenue (off Hall Street) just up the road from Pita Pit, across the road from Newtown School, next block down from Wellington Hospital going south. You’ll see “Hall Avenue” clearly marked with a white signpost. The church is located in a back section. Plenty of free parks. If you’re catching a bus from the city, get off at the Wellington Hospital bus stop and walk to Hall Street – Hall Avenue is off that.
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